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Writer's pictureAnn Filler

Sighs and a Dash of Envy

I enjoy using social media and especially like to keep up with what friends and family are doing. My social media “friends” range from my family, my church members, our neighbors, my co-workers as well as some of both of our daughters’ friends.


Recently I’ve noticed that doing this social media thing can also bring pangs of grief when reading about Lisa’s friends. I saw last week that one of her best friends from high school just got engaged. Great pictures of her friend and the fiancé. Several of her college friends post pictures of their children---on a boat ride, at the park, or celebrating a birthday. While I couldn’t be happier for these friends, and I certainly celebrate with them, their posts also make me sigh. It makes me think of the “could have been” times had Lisa lived. She could have been getting engaged, married, having children. Sigh.


However, I refuse to allow myself to dwell on the pangs of grief, or even continuously look backward. It would serve no purpose and leave me floundering. Instead, Our family has chosen to honor Lisa's memory with a non-profit organization in her name. The purpose of the non-profit organization is to provide gift bags, funded totally by donations, to give to someone who is hurting or grieving and have a compassionate conversation. Lisa was known among her friends for her compassionate communications---by hand-written notes, or emails or phone calls. We learned this after her death when her friends and co-workers sent us samples of what she had written to them. We were amazed with the depth and volume of her communications and compassion.


So this project, named Lisa’s Legacy: Compassionate Conversations and Hope, is a true reflection of her life. It makes me happy to work on it. I see the joy and gratitude that it brings to other people who are hurting.


I find it so ironic that this would be the kind of project that Lisa would have liked to spearhead. I often wish I could call on her for advice or suggestions when working on Lisa’s Legacy. But I also reflect that God has put so many other people in my life who are doing just that---supporting the advancement of the Lisa’s Legacy project. For that welcome help, I am often overwhelmed and awestruck with gratitude. I like to believe that God’s presence maybe be guiding us as we reach out to people who want to support someone who is grieving.

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